


1-800-Horny

by dabblingwithwords



Category: Naruto
Genre: Dirty Talk, M/M, Phone Sex, Porn with a tentative plot, Sasuke has a great voice, so this needed to happen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-16
Updated: 2019-11-16
Packaged: 2021-02-07 08:10:47
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,150
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21454825
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dabblingwithwords/pseuds/dabblingwithwords
Summary: Naruto is horny.There’s nothing new or interesting about that.But it does set up why he’s maybe, kind of,really seriouslyconsidering calling that sex line Kiba showed him.
Relationships: Uchiha Sasuke/Uzumaki Naruto
Comments: 9
Kudos: 408





	1-800-Horny

Naruto is horny.

That’s not– there’s nothing new or interesting about that.

But it does set up why exactly he’s maybe, kind of, _really seriously_ considering calling that sex talk line Kiba showed him when they were wasted. Because Naruto could always watch porn, and he could also just– imagine shit or whatever, but he’s a little buzzed and really wanting some kind of interaction that isn’t off Tinder or Grinder and–

_And_–

Dirty talk is the hottest fucking thing and Naruto _really_ gets off on voices so–

This–

It’s–

He takes another shot.

This, he’s doing this. He presses call before he can chicken out. And it rings. And rings one more time and now the nerves are back and shit maybe he shouldn’t have–

There’s an automated voice speaking before he gets the chance to hang up. It talks him through his confidentiality, payment over the line with a credit card, along with rules for the call:

  1. No asking for personal information
  2. No death threats
  3. If this is an emergency hang up and call 9-1-1

And then the voice asks him to press 1 for a woman and 2 for a man and Naruto has a split second of deliberation before he presses–

“Hello,” a deep voice says and Naruto freezes.

Shit.

The guy sounds hot. He’s been turned on all night and this guy’s voice is really, _really_ nice but when the silence stretches Naruto realizes he hasn’t said anything–

“H-hi,” he chokes out and hates himself.

“Are you already jacking off?” the man asks, sounding exasperated, and Naruto blushes.

“No! No, sorry, no I– no, I haven’t uh, no,” Naruto’s nervous, he’s fumbling, and there’s a silence on the other end before the guy speaks again.

“You haven’t done this before.”

It isn’t a question.

“No,” Naruto admits, running a hand through his hair, “well, I mean, I’ve like, had phone sex once–”

“Why are you so nervous then?”

“I don’t know you?” Naruto ventures and he thinks he can hear the guy sigh.

Fuck, is he that boring? Naruto’s really fucking this up and it’s barely been five minutes he should’ve just jacked off by himself and gone to bed–

“What do you like?” the guy asks.

Naruto blinks. And swallows because even if he feels like a dumbass the guy still sounds ridiculously hot.

“Like positions?”

There’s a static silence. Then–

“Have you never participated in dirty talk before?”

Naruto flushes, embarrassed.

“Hey I never said I had a humiliation kink, asshole.”

“Shame, I bet you’d look good blushing.”

“Wh– that– you have no idea what I look like!”

“You’re right I don’t. Why not tell me what you’re wearing?”

“Uh–I– boxers?”

“Color?”

“…Orange?”

The voice on the other side had gone quiet but then there’s a breath, muffled, but definitely–

“Hey, dickhead, are you _laughing_ at me?”

“You just suck at this.”

“I’m paying you _literal money_ to get me off–“

“This isn’t doing it for you?”

“How is this your job– I–”

“You don’t like my voice?” the man asks and his tone lowers, drops, and Naruto feels a fizzle of heat shoot through him at the sound, “I’ve been told it’s nice.”

“It–“ he swallows, anticipation making his heart spike, “…it’s fine.”

“Hm, do _you_ like my voice?”

Naruto’s mouth is dry.

“Yeah,” it’s mostly breath but Naruto, fuck, he can’t help it– somehow all the teasing combined with the guy’s low baritone had gotten to him–

“What else do you like?”

Shit this is– this is happening isn’t it? Right now this– fuck this guy has a _great voice_. Naruto swallows around a horribly dry throat– heat pooling low in his stomach– both from anticipation and being hopelessly, _hopelessly_ turned on.

Fucking hell.

He takes in a shuddering breath and puts the phone on speaker. He’ll need both hands he thinks, to either tear his hair out or jack himself off– either one. Or both. He isn’t picky right now, isn’t really thinking of much besides–

“I… I like your voice,” Naruto says, a little dumbly but the man doesn’t mock him this time, just hums encouragingly, “and I– uh– I’m verse but tonight I wanna bottom.”

He just kind of blurted that one right out.

He can’t help but cringe at the clumsy way he’s speaking but he’s not turned on enough to lose his shame _just_ yet–

“Oh? You like taking it, Naruto?”

Ah, shit, _that_–

He flushes, all the way down to his chest because this isn’t something he’s ever had to admit out loud before but he’s pretty sure the guy could tell him to walk out the window and he’d do it.

“Y-yeah. I– fuck, I –”

“How do you like it? I bet you’re loud.”

“I am,” Naruto agrees, breathless, and a little pleased to hear that the man’s voice cracks a bit, barely noticeable but Naruto has him _right by his ear_ and _that’s_ really hot– the idea that this guy is also getting turned on– “I like it rough too.”

There’s a slight shift on the other end of the receiver, a breath, still barely there but Naruto hears it anyway–

“Do you?” Naruto asks, encouraged.

“Like it rough?”

“Yeah.”

There’s a silence, and Naruto begins to panic that maybe he went too far, maybe there are rules and he’s not supposed to ask questions back–

“Yes,” the man answers, and Naruto wonders if he’s smiling, “I could definitely ruin you.”

Naruto chokes.

That– okay, he’s fully hard and– shit, okay, okay, _okay_–

“Fuck please,” Naruto hisses and doesn’t bother to take this slower, just reaches for the waistband of his boxers and pulls them down to his thighs, doesn’t even bother with getting them off properly ‘cause there’s really no time– “I want– fuck, I want you to fuck me so bad. Want– shit–”

“Breathe, idiot,” the man says but he sounds amused and Naruto flushes, all the way down to his chest– “don’t touch your cock yet.”

Naruto lets out a sound that’s embarrassingly close to a whine. He feels caught out.

“Why?” he pouts, breathing through his nose and turning his attention to the ceiling. Maybe if he counts all the cracks he can take his mind off–

“Play with your nipples,” the man says.

Naruto blinks.

“Uh–why? I’m not a girl, dude,” Naruto begins but cuts himself off when he hears the guy sigh.

“This’ll be interesting,” he says and he sounds way too smug for Naruto’s liking, “do what I said.”

“God, you’re bossy,” Naruto grumbles but he can’t pretend that it didn’t make a flare of heat bloom in the pit of his stomach, didn’t make his cock twitch.

He does what the guy says, rubs one between his forefinger and thumb but–

“Gently,” the guy says, “close your eyes. Pretend it’s me.”

Naruto lets out a breath and forces himself to relax, to take this slow, to not just reach down further and jack off like he wants.

And that adds another level to this– him listening.

He’s not usually obedient, he doesn’t typically like people telling him what he can and can’t do, and he’s never been with someone sexually whose naturally taken that position with him. But he can’t ignore the fact that he’s doing what this guy asks and maybe it’s pleasing him, maybe Naruto actions are turning him on too, and so Naruto follows that thought and runs a nail down his stomach the same time he pinches his right nipple.

His sharp inhale is clear.

“Rougher now,” the guy tells him, eerily in tune to Naruto’s train of thought, “tell me how it feels.”

Naruto flushes but does as the man says and it makes him want to squirm– these little pricks of sharp pain that travel across his chest.

“It– it’s good,” Naruto whispers.

“Just good?” he presses and Naruto shifts on the bed, thinks of a faceless man with a deep baritone running his teeth over his skin, biting down–

“Oh,” Naruto sighs, then laughs a bit because damn, he’s kind of been missing out, “didn’t know they’d be this sensitive.”

“Make them red,” the guy whispers and he sounds engaged, sounds like he’s holding on just to hear Naruto’s reactions so Naruto doesn’t bother to hold back and eventually he just– it’s– 

“Now you can touch yourself.” 

“Thank fuck,” Naruto breathes.

His lotion is on the bedside table but he’s so impatient he’s trembling so he takes to spitting into his palm before wrapping a shaking hand around his dick.

“No lube?” the man asks, amused, but his voice is getting deeper, a little rougher, like the words are scraping from a dry throat.

“Can’t wait,” Naruto admits, grinning sheepishly, “spits fine for no–ow, fuck.”

“Hm,” the man hums, contemplating, “I would suck you off.”

Naruto’s breath stutters.

“Hah– that–”

“You’d make us both messy, wouldn’t you, Naruto?” the voice continues, and Naruto’s holding on to a fucking _thread_–

“If– shit, would you press me down and fuck me after?” Naruto babbles, gripping himself, pumping and _oh_– that feels really good– that’s nice–

“I’d make you beg for it first,” the guy says, still composed, still deep and that’s _better_– “I’d hold you down and suck you off until you couldn’t cum anymore. _Then_ I’d fuck you.”

He can’t help the moan that shatters through him, can’t help it even if he tried, and he really wants to say–

“What’s your name?” Naruto pleads, picking up the pace of his hand, “I– even if it’s fake just–”

“Sasuke,” the voice says.

“Oh,” Naruto sighs, then, “_Sasuke_–”

The man sucks in a breath.

Shit.

“You sound like you’re about to cum,” Sasuke says and Naruto’s nodding as if the other man can see him–

“I– fuck, I’m getting close, just–”

“Stop touching yourself.”

It’s not at all what Naruto had been expecting and he shivers– freezing despite his entire body protesting, his toes curling and a tremor tracks it’s way with a force down his thighs.

“Hah– shit– isn’t it– isn’t it your job to get me off?” Naruto laughs, breathless and still teetering, his skin feels tight and hot and _fuck_– he never teases himself like this, has never had a partner edge him–

“Eventually,” Sasuke says and there’s some more shuffling on the other line and then, “I want to talk about rimming you first.”

Naruto’s head thumps against his headboard but he barely feels it.

“Shit man,” Naruto hisses, “I– don’t think I’m even gonna last another five minutes.”

“Probably not,” Sasuke agrees and that makes Naruto want to last _longer_ out of sheer spite, “do you have lube?”

Naruto’s heart skips.

“I’m almost out,” he admits, a little embarrassed.

“Do you have enough to finger yourself?”

He’s–

Fuck he’s going to die.

“Y– yeah,” Naruto pants, reaches to the discarded bottle and squirts the rest out onto his fingers, “yeah I–”

“On your knees,” Sasuke interrupts and Naruto’s cock twitches at the domineering tone.

“Fuck you’re really hot,” Naruto says and does as he’s told, the mattress rubbing against his cock and making him shudder, “is this how you’d want me? If you were here?”

“For right now,” Sasuke tells him, voice a little ragged, “raise your ass up.”

“Ah– hmm– okay, fuck I–”

“Did you start without asking?” Sasuke asks, a dangerous edge to his words and Naruto can’t help but stifle himself into his pillows.

“One– one finger– that’s–”

“You’re lucky I’m not there,” Sasuke says, smooth and composed and Naruto _really_ wants to hear this man come undone, “that would’ve gotten you in trouble.”

Naruto laughs but it’s breathless– weak–

“Fuck okay you sadistic bastard can I– shit, can I move?” Naruto hisses, trying in vain to keep his hips still and distantly wondering when he became so fucking obedient when the guy can’t even _see_ him–

“Beg first.”

“Wh–” Naruto swallows, turns his head against the pillow to stare incredulously at his phone, “you _asshole_–”

“What happened to you listening?” Sasuke asks but he’s grinning, Naruto can tell this time from how light his words are, “Do you want to cum or not?”

And the thing is– _the thing is_– Naruto could cum. He could jack off _right now_ and have a pretty satisfying orgasm but he knows that if he keeps playing this game with Sasuke he’ll end up having an _amazing_ orgasm and that–

That’s enough to get him to listen.

“Ugh, fuck you,” Naruto sighs but he’s smiling, because despite everything he’s having fun and he kind of wants to make Sasuke flustered too– “please, can I touch myself Daddy?”

There’s silence.

Naruto muffles his laughter into his shoulder.

“That– I’m hanging up.”

“No!” Naruto laughs– almost cackling because this is hilarious, “You didn’t like that?”

“In what world would I like that?”

“I hooked up with a guy once who did.”

There is a heavy pause.

“You’re a grown man.”

“That’s really not the point, Sasuke,” Naruto says, feeling oddly endeared, “do you prefer sir? Please don’t tell me you like that whole master–”

“New rule: you don’t talk anymore.”

“Hah! You’d have to gag me for that.”

Sasuke inhales– sharp and clearer than all the other small sounds he’s made and Naruto can’t help but latch onto that–

“Fuck you’re into that aren’t you?” Naruto asks and his dick reminds him that _hey, still hard and when you grind your hips like that it’s really good so you should keep_– “Want me to wear a ball gag for you, Sasuke? Or–shit– your underwear? Wanna see how that would look balled up in my mouth?”

“Y– that,” Sasuke stutters and Naruto can’t help the wide grin that spreads across his face even as heat flares, sharp and hot, in his stomach, “_fuck_.”

Bingo.

“I bet you’re into some freaky shit too,” Naruto continues, almost obsessed with these noises Sasuke is making– this shuffling he can still hear, “you wanna tie me up or something Sasuke? Huh? Wanna gag me? Wanna tie my hands behind my back and just go to fucking town?”

“Jesus,” Sasuke whispers and Naruto feels victorious because _yes_, hearing Sasuke pant is almost as great as hearing him talk and Naruto doesn’t know if Sasuke’s even _supposed_ to be getting into this but that just makes it _hotter_–

“Let me fuck myself,” Naruto whispers, puts a moan in there that’s not entirely fake ‘cause now he’s into this and if this is teasing Sasuke as well then it’s fucking _worth it_– “c’mon, let me get ready for you.”

The groan on the other line is loud and clear and Sasuke sounds _so hot_–

“Please tell me you’re touching yourself,” Naruto pleads, his mouth running on autopilot, any form of coherent thought long since abandoned, “please, god, that’d be– _fuck_– that’d be so fucking hot–”

“Two fingers,” Sasuke says, voice more breathless than it had been, “fuck yourself on two fingers right now.”

“Finally,” Naruto sighs and then _does_. It’s a sting because he’d barely gotten used to one but that doesn’t matter, it _doesn’t_, because what if Sasuke were behind him? What if Naruto was doing this for him, showing off, putting on a show– “Hah–nng– wow feels good–”

He thinks Sasuke laughs.

Naruto wishes, fleetingly, that he could see what the other man’s smile looks like.

“I really want to eat you out,” Sasuke says, matter of fact, and Naruto’s whole body shudders in heat.

He’s only been rimmed once but it had been amazing, nearly too much, because it’s a frustrating build up of sensation that makes Naruto’s toes curl just thinking about it.

“Ngh– please–”

“Can you cum untouched?”

“Oh, God, don’t make me–”

“Don’t touch your dick.”

“F-Fuck you–”

“Find your prostate. I want to hear what that sounds like.”

He crooks and kind of drags and–

“Ah–”

He applies a bit more pressure, finds a rhythm that–

“Fuck– Sas’ke– fuck!”

“There?”

Naruto wants to be a smartass but he also _really_ wants to cum–

“_Yeah_, there, you sadistic–”

“I bet you look good fucking yourself. You sound so desperate.”

Sasuke’s voice is rougher, deeper, and it just makes Naruto grind his hips down into the mattress harder.

“I look fuckin’ amazing,” Naruto laughs, breathless, hot– _building_– “just want you to fuck me.”

“First with a vibrator and then with my cock, how’s that sound?”

He can’t stifle _that_ groan and it’s loud, Naruto knows he’s loud, and he’d be a bit embarrassed if he weren’t so fucking turned on by that idea. He’s never tried that before but hell, he wants to.

And if Naruto listens closely– focuses through this heady haze–

“Sasuke– you–”

“I’m touching myself,” Sasuke confirms, _finally_ sounding affected, _finally_ matching Naruto’s desperation in his tone– “fuck, Naruto–”

That– 

_Fuck _that–

Between the grinding and rubbing his prostate and _Sasuke_ and _Sasuke jerking off_ and imaging _Sasuke_ behind him and _Sasuke’s voice_–

“I– I–”

“Ask,” Sasuke commands, voice deeper than ever, “ask me.”

“Fu–uk– c’n I– Sas, can I please–”

“Please what?”

“_Cum_! Fuck, can I–”

“Yes– hell–”

Naruto bites into his pillow as it overtakes him but he’s certain he’s still loud– certain he didn’t catch all of that but it’ll sound muffled, sound like he’s gagged–

Distantly, he can hear Sasuke release a shivering moan but he’s too busy trembling and shaking to really focus on anything besides how amazing he feels.

This is so, _so_ much better than just jacking off by himself.

There’s a heavy silence, and Naruto begins to realize the reality of the past thirty minutes–

“So,” he swallows, voice rough and dry, “is it inappropriate if I ask you out?”

Sasuke–

Sasuke laughs.

“If you beg for it.”

“Asshole,” Naruto sighs but it’s sleepy and satiated with no heat at all.

“Hm, ask me out then.”

“I just did,” Naruto mutters and he thinks the effect is ruined by his smile, “wanna go out?”

“Unfortunately yes,” Sasuke says and then sighs, “I didn’t think I’d cum.”

“Why not?”

“I’m not technically supposed to.”

“Huh. So you’re just supposed to get other people off?”

There’s a pause.

“No one’s gotten me hard before,” Sasuke admits, a little stunned, and Naruto can’t help the pride that bubbles in his chest.

“Really?”

“Yes.”

“Wow,” Naruto says, “I’m amazing.”

“You’re an idiot, apparently.”

“Hey, if you want me to put out you gotta be nice.”

“It’s _so_ convenient you’re this easy.”

“Wh– hey asshole, I’m– just– whatever.”

Sasuke’s laugh is soft and light.

It hits Naruto then– that he’s supposed to pay now. That this was a transaction and not him talking to just–

“Uh, how does the payment process work?” Naruto asks, feeling like he’s sobering up and it leaves a weird feeling in his chest, this tightness–

“This is on me,” Sasuke says, “but you’re buying dinner.”

Naruto doesn’t try to fight the smile.

“Deal.”

**Author's Note:**

> lol idk happy weekend!! <3


End file.
